A teaspoon of wisdom

There's a lot to say this morning.

On one handedness: It's not that I can't multitask, but it's a bit pointless multitasking when both hands are covered in butter and you're nursing a soggy bagel. So believe me Rudy, I was making up retorts way before and many more than the ones I managed to get across punching keys with my pinky.

On physical displays of affection: The guidelines are clear. If you're going out with someone, touch them for goodness sake. Sincerely of course, don't reach out for a handful of ass all the time. One of the reason's they're going out with you is because they enjoy your hugs and kisses, so make like you actually want to cuddle; don't leave her thinking she smells bad just because you can't find the energy to put an arm across her shoulders. For all the male dominance that pose might be likened to, I think it's great. If they keep shrugging you off though, you might want to reassess your relationship, she probably doesn't want to be seen with you.

On body language: It's a given you have to work your way up to that point. Although this is pretty frustrating, you better let the girl take the lead when it comes to the bases. She might blame you for being unromantic and lacking in initiative, but she'll probably be more comfortable with the whole thing. We always find reasons to blame guys.